Its been really long since I used my writing hand. I fervently agree to this statement. There has been so many things happening around lately that I got so carried away with the wind. Let me not just fill you up with the old stories of this misfit living. I want to give you a small insight on the abrupt turn my life made a couple of days back.
Its like a longing; to visit a place and relive its wonders once again. A sense of nostalgia invades you all of a sudden and you’re magically teleported to lovely memories and quirky pictures of funny faces and overnight drives. So, I took my chance and never regreted it. Although I had to bag on my mother for this, she finally relented with a favour ~ That I visit a temple en route to Pondicherry. The very name of the city excited me. I quickly accepted the deadly task, I had no idea about.
All through this short-lived life, I have travelled to multiple cities in the country. I have taken tonga rides on the crowded streets of buddhagaya, I have bathed with the rise of the morning sun at Kasi, I have seen some humongous caves. I have eaten road side Dhaba rotis on the lonesome highways of Maharashtra. I have fought with diarrhea and nausea each alternate journey. You would think I am a bit of a young traveller, but I wouldn’t say so. When I was young, summer vacation meant endless train journeys and small town halts and language barriers with abundant medical supplies. I fell sick each time we toured. I was fragile as to what I eat, so I was conscious when I grew up! We took all this strain to visit temples.A different one each time! A series maybe.
My mom believes in God as much as any Indian mother would. She prays for me, solely for me alone. Maybe it was because of this compulsion, this search for God, that made me realise that God was not there, and it was just a million stars studded with the sky. Don’t get me wrong now! I don’t prefer atheism. I believe every religion preaches to be good, do good and die good. But I am not conviced with idol worship and hymns and prayers and spending crores of money to get to a place just to see a mere statue. People have beliefs. I don’t object. I am also told that I should never enforce my views on someone else. But how is it even right if someone tries to make me believe in something that probably never looked at me when I was asking questions to it.
We are idealised to believe in supremacy. No one likes peer questioners. The society is so crooked regarding these voiceless issues. They don’t like to change their perceptions. They are not rational in their arguments. They name people like me as ‘rebels’ or brats or some other stupid term because these people cannot answer my compelling requisitions.
I am so done with it though. I no longer intend to fight when they repel with my attack and do not mean to fight me back. This is going to be a long story in years to come. There are still rigid rules and cultural impotency(s) that needs to be changed. We are lagging because we unite in weakness and not in strength. I hope the people raise their voice against these social unjust paradigms and becoming more aware of themselves.